A Whale of a Time

Do you know a kid who's bored with Legos, who's done with construction, and who's longing for a meaningful imaginative play gift? No? Well, you might want to consider this fabulous set anyway.

This whole shebang is like living "Free Willy." Or, "Rescue Willy," if you will. The Whale Rescue Mission puts a powerful Killer Whale in danger, and only the child, equipped with a boat, a helicopter, a rig, and a crew, can save him from disaster. The whale's jaw moves, so it can articulate its thanks as it's hauled from the hazardous sea, presumably to be deposited in calmer waters (and NOT imprisoned in some Shamu concentration camp, please). There's many lessons to be learned while playing with this toy, and most of them can be taught during bath time. Most excellent.

If the Whale Rescue doesn't float his or her boat, check out the Mummy Set or the Everglades set (shrink-wrapped bodies and gators, respectively). They're all about 50 bucks for hours of fun. At www.constplay.com.

Self-Cleaning Hip Hop

The thing many kids ask for during the holidays is a pet. Normally, this is frowned upon, since puppies and kittens can truly get caught in the holiday shuffle. But what about something far less demanding? What about... frogs?

This Frog-O-Sphere from Brookstone is a pretty nifty idea. They call it a "miniature community" consisting of a little aquarium, rocks, something called "Living Gravel", a plant, a cleaning tool and TWO African Dwarf frogs (I guess two makes a community. Maybe a calling them a couple is just too personal?). Anyway, this little ecosphere is pretty self-contained, requiring you and yours to do not much more than feed the happy hoppers (they're actually swimmers) twice a week with handy pellets. I myself have had these frogs in the past, and I must say that they're pretty cute and fun to watch.

Did I mention that the entire set up is just $40? And they supply a year's worth of food? Check it out at www.brookstone.com. It's hip hop you'll want your kids to play.

Star Maker

If you live in a populated area, chances are you have night time light pollution. Simply put, there's too much artificial light at night to allow the natural light of the stars to shine bright. That means that kids have never really seen the actual night sky in all its glory on a regular basis.

While this tiny facsimile of a night sky isn't the real McCoy, at least kids can use it to identify the stars in their proper places on the correct night. Just tap in the time, date and place, and the Star Theater reproduces your night sky right in the bedroom, complete with labels for proper star and planet identification. It's like having your very own planetarium, and is just the perfect gift for the curious nine year old in your life. This way, once you actually go camping or at least go somewhere without that light pollution, the kid can ID the stars.

Find the Star Theater (complete with meteor maker) at www.hearthsong.com.

Lightweight for Lightweights

I think it's always nice to have a toy or two lying around the living room, just in case someone (be it child or adult) wants to play. Of course, that doesn't mean plastic dreck. It means something arty and interesting.

These subtle cork blocks are arty and interesting. They're functional enough for any child (because, no matter how hard you try, most kids just aren't all that interested in aesthetics). But they're just fabulous enough, with an artsy pedigree and ultra-safe environmentally sound veggie dyes, to be of interest to design oriented adults. In short, these are a perfect gift for a parent who loves, as perhaps you do, to leave a toy or two out on the coffee table for the masses. Bring your friend a set, and see what evolves upon your return: a skyscaper, a castle, a canned soup factory.

An added plus? These are cork, folks, so no one gets hurt. Check them out at www.momastore.org.

Bites On The Run

Every mother knows the drill: you're out with your small child, and suddenly they're gripped with starvation style hunger. Problem is, you're unprepared. Besides hiring your very own boy scout to keep you loaded with delicious and filling snacks, what can a mother do?

These Little Bites silicone storage jars might be a start in the right direction. The lilliputian scale means they're easy to store, either in the car, your bag, or at home. They're equally at home in the fridge, at room temp, or in the microwave. And they are blessedly free of nasty chemicals like BPA, Phthalate, and lead (because poisoning your children as you're nourishing them is bad, bad form). Plus, they're an ideal baby shower add-on gift for a new mom, who will know nothing of the hungry wolf-like screams that can emanate from a backseat strapped, ravenous toddler. Give them the Little Bites and save them from this dreadful fate.

Find these adorable containers at www.mightynest.com. They don't come with the actual snacks, but I'm sure you can figure that part out.

Name in Lights

I want to reiterate strongly that I am not a fan of the monogram. I've always found them stuffy and silly in virtually any permutation. But when it comes to kids, all bets are off: they need to develop a love for letters, especially their own.

And what could be a better (and sneakier) way to throw a little ABC into their little lives than through this fabulous light fixture? Created by artist (NOT actress) Amy Adams, each little light shines a different letter of your choice. You could suspend these in a corner, with a lone first initial. You could spell out a three letter name in a staggered arrangement (for cost purposes, I wouldn't recommend anything longer). Or, you could go for the simple ABC, CAT or DOG. So many lighting options!

The light's bisque color also gives you tons of latitude in terms of kiddie decor. Check out the letter light at www.rompstore.com. At $110.00 each, these lights aren't exactly cheap, but what price would you place on literacy, anyway?

Sleeping in the Fall Foliage

Fall is a great time to do an overhaul on the little details at home, like pillow sham colors, sheets and accessories. And if your kid (or a kid you know and particularly like) needs new sheets, may I suggest these for the fall season and beyond?

Fact is, I loathe most "kids'" bedding. It's usually a themed disaster, merely a marketing tool at worst, or a juvenile visual cacophony at best. But these are modernist, classy, and boast some staying power. Boodalee's "In the Trees" sheet set is a simple wood grain print on lovely crisp bedding. It's fairly unisex, mostly because it's orange, a color that mixes equally well with blue, brown, or even pink (for the ecologically minded girly-girl). And because these are "good" sheets, as opposed to those pilled-up, threadbare messes from bargain stores, they'll actually last as long as good sheets should (which, depending on child-level punishment, could mean years of use).

You can find "In the Trees" at www.velocityartanddesign.com. And if, for some reason, orange doesn't float the decor boat, they have many other kiddie bedding choices, none of which are lame.

Send In the Clown

So you must remember this toy. The Bozo bop bag, in all its ugly glory. And oh, it is an ugly thing, but some toys become classics for a reason.

Because, let's face facts: you can teach the kid non-violence all day long, but every once in a while, they really need to cut loose on something. That something might as well be Bozo. First because he's a clown (I really, really HATE clowns; they're nastier than any monster), and second because this is harmless good fun. Bozo bounces back. Bozo takes no offense. Bozo takes all the abuse. And, once the kids have gone to bed, you can whale on Bozo's indestructible frame, too. Wow, good fun for the kids and therapy for you, all for under thirty bucks (well, maybe a little more, since you might want to spring for an electric pump to plump Bozo up to fighting form).

Summon Bozo into your life by going to www.backtobasicstoys.com. And the next time your child is beyond frustration, just send in the clown.

Wild Thing

Not only is Halloween rapidly approaching, but the movie "Where the Wild Things Are" is finally ready for release. When these two things collide, your child's "Max Suit" is born.

Take, for instance, this Canis Lupus ear warmer. It's warm and furry and obviously very wolfy. In fact, when paired with a white union suit, it could approximate a Max outfit, but with a ton of panache. Although the ear warmer is around 30 bucks or so, a union suit is cheap (and anyway, have you gotten a look at costume prices these days? Who's making them, Versace?).

One of the great things about this item is that it goes way beyond Halloween, into the longer term world of the make believe, or even where wild things still tread. Check it out at www.etsy.com.

Sailed Into Town For Candy

Ah, Halloween. The magic night approaches. And are you prepared? If your little boy still doesn't have a costume, here's one that might float his boat.

Say an ahoy to this sailor costume. It's so cute. The adorable blue jumpsuit (so easy) includes a slightly muscular torso appropriate for a deck swabber. The little cap perches rakishly on his head. And that's it. No fancy makeup to apply, no sweaty body begging for a hydration IV halfway through your candy route. It's military, which might appease your tyke, but boasts no guns, camouflage, or war insignia, which might appease you. Who doesn't like a guy who's in town for a little fun, or a lot of sweet candy haul?

Plus, this costume might get repeat wear in the dress up pile. What could be better? Find it at www.costumersupercenter.com. It's a great way to take him on the town.

These Boots Were Made for Abuse

I don't know about you, but in this household we have a serious problem with children's shoes. No, it's not the fashion touches, the colors or the fit. It's the fact that, within about two weeks, my daughter can reduce a perfectly respectable pair of shoes to a demoralized, shredded mess.

I honestly don't know what little kids do to footwear; I suspect they carry their own tiny garbage compactors around and run their footwear through it daily. Luckily, with these Timberland Asphalt Trail boots, I think I've managed to stop the Shoe Shredder in her tracks. Hopefully, these extremely sturdy motorcycle-ish boots would fit the bill for your hard walker as well. The soles are thick and impervious to wear. The leather is a bit stiff, and of the kind that actually looks better with a few scratches and scuffs. Yet, they're still stylish enough to match with a cute dress, tuck skinny jeans into, or pair with leggings and a tunic. I think these Timberlands walk all over those fancier European shoe brands, with their fey suede appliques and delicate sensibilities (you know who you are).

At about $90, the Timberland Asphalt Trail boots aren't exactly cheap. But having to buy replacement pairs every two months would cut deeply into your monthly nut, too. Just imagine: a single pair of boots per season. Try living the dream and order a pair at www.zappos.com.

Lady Made in the Shade

Sometimes, when searching for appropriate girl gifts, it's really handy to have an actual girl on hand to vote yay or nay.

Take, for instance, this very lovely "Bohemian" parasol. At first glance, it looks like something any little girl would love. It completely adds a new element to her dress up routine. It shades the sun from her little face. A grouping of them (priced at $24/each, actually affordable) could be arranged as a makeshift creative shelter. And each and every parasol is different from the colors to the patterns. After much perusal, I showed this find to my discriminating little girl tester, and she confirmed its brilliance. Now, of course, she wants one (indeed, she's having delusions of grandeur and thinking she's "Head Tadpole").

Order the parasol for any little girl and watch her squeal with delight. Just don't let her sing in the rain with it; it isn't waterproof. Available in all its multicolored glory at www.wisteria.com.

Baby Art That Endures

It's not often that I repeat a blog entry, but since this item was featured on Find A Toad months ago and this is Find A Tadpole, I decided to make an exception. Meet the baby shower or first time baby visit gift that's completely unexpected and original: artist Susan Arena's print series, Joseph's Alphabet.

Arena is a working artist in Los Angeles, educated at Harvard and Yale with many shows under her belt. Her Alphabet was inspired by the birth of her son (and also inspired by simple practicality: it's easier to work on many smaller pieces than huge ones when you're a first-time mom). Each letter boasts a visual representation done "Arena style," with whimsy, humor, and just a little bit of delightful creepiness. Order one which corresponds with the Baby's first name, and I guarantee you have yourself a winning gift. This is real art that can hang in a nursery (or on the kid's bedroom door as she grows), for years to come.

I've posted a couple examples of her work here, but really you should hit her site at www.susanarena.com to have a look at the entire series. If you really like the Baby in question, you could even spring for the entire Joseph's Alphabet as an art/educational investment. Check it out! It sure beats handing over another "receiving" blanket.

Magic Rabbit

I know it's hard to believe, but Halloween is on its way. And one of the fun things parents get to do (before the kids are old enough to have set opinions about alter egos) is choosing a costume for the little kid.

By "little," I mean between the ages of 2-4 and too young to protest. That's how, for instance, I got away with dressing my two-year-old as a skunk one year. And that's how you can dress your unsuspecting child as a rabbit-in-a-hat. Really. As you can see from the photo, this costume is a complete bunny with a "hat" hoop skirt completing the ensemble for easy walking. It's completely hilarious. If you can talk an older child into accompanying them dressed in the magician outfit, so much the better. Your kid will get a hefty candy haul, guaranteeing you weeks of pilfered "fun-sized" Snickers. Excellent.

Such an ingenious costume doesn't come cheap: about $98. But oh my, the memories. Check it out at www.chasing-fireflies.com. And if the pop-up bunny doesn't seem magical enough, this site has the best costume selection I've seen in a long, long time.

Dress for Party Success

There are nothing but parties coming in the next few months. Besides the never ending birthday events, there are holidays and family get-togethers galore. And every little girl loves a party dress.

Problem is, the party dress prices. I regularly see admittedly lovely stuff for well over $100. That's just crazy. However, after scouring blogs and online sources, I found Redfish Kids clothing. The dresses, as you can see at right, are sophisticated without turning little girls into little temptresses (no spaghetti straps or clingy cuts here). The Mandarin, for instance, looks like a classic cheongsam, but in a cute way (no, your daughter will not look like a concubine). The Lucky dress looks more classic little girl, with a big skirt and old-fashioned line, but the pattern is refreshingly hip. The greatest thing about these dresses is that you can easily dress them up for a party, or layer them over some jeans for a laid back school look. Now, that's versatility.

And the price point? Under seventy bucks. Yeah, ok, that's still some money, but considering the wear she'll get out of one of these dresses, I don't think it's unreasonable. You can even pass it on to a fortunate friend or relative (and they'll really want to take it). Find these two dresses and many more at www.redfishkidsclothing.com.

One Old Fossil

Likely as not, if you have or know a child between the ages of about eight and ten, they are fascinated by fossils. No, not grandma and grandpa, but real fossils from a real long time ago, like prehistoric times.

Now you don't have to go to the museum to look at one. Just order a fossil fish. He hails from Wyoming, but long before cowboys and skiers traversed its slopes and valleys, think 50 MILLION years ago. He swam in salty seas, met an untimely and ancient demise, and was buried in mud before turning into stone. Now he's a rock that your child can examine to her heart's content. What a totally cool science lesson.

Dig Finny Fossil up at www.theevolutionstore.com. He's just $29.00 for a little piece of history.

Shine a Little Doglight

Although I personally don't know anyone having a baby at the moment, they're persistent little scamps with a habit of being born all the time. I'm sure you know one, and thus need a gift.

This is not something you'll find on any baby registry. In fact, it's quite quirky and odd. But, for the right parents (let's face it: the infant could give a hoot about how the nursery looks), this nightlight might cast a perfect glow. The Carlos nightlight features this proud yet Elizabethan collared chihuahua (recent operation or hotspot???) who sits quietly on a table or nightstand, helping a sleepy new mom or dad find their way cribside. Carlos is the perfect little dog: useful, cute, and never barks. Because the last thing new parents need is a noisy canine.

Adopt Carlos and send him on his way to a new happy home. He's waiting at www.mattermatters.com.

Get the Baby a POD

There's lots and lots of things no one ever tells you about having a baby. Many simply can't be explained until the baby is here. But bathing isn't one of them.

Few things are a bigger challenge for a sleep-deprived, hormone-addled new mom than bathing that baby. That silly tiny tub. The infant's prone position. Your back breaking crouched position. The possibility of drowning or at least dunking the kid accidentally. The soapy squirming. It's just impossible. This gadget, however, looks like a good solution. It's a baby bathing bucket called a WashPOD. Fill with water and stick the baby in upright (NOT head-first, please. Are you really that tired?). Holding the baby upright with one hand, wash with the other. You don't need to worry about scrubbing, since an infant isn't usually covered with dirt. And it's far easily to gently wash little faces and ears when they're not at risk of submersion.

The bucket has a limited lifespan of only six months or so. But it'll save a lot of hassle and worry, not to mention back pain. Find it at www.giggle.com.

For Your Little Worrywart

Although we'd all like to idealize childhood as fabulously worry-free, that's really not the case. There's plenty to keep a kid wrinkling his brow with anxiety, from bullies on the playground to spelling tests to lousy lunches. Let me repeat: childhood is NOT a worry-free zone.

However, as we adults know from our many forays into therapy of all kinds, voicing and articulating our fears and concerns helps take the bite out of them. Here's a gift to help children do the same (because, honestly, they're way too young for shrinks). This Worry Woolie Notebook acts as a fuzzy repository for all those worries banging around in their young brains. They can scribble them down, draw pictures, write lists, plan coping scenarios, and face those fears in black and white (or purple ink, whatever). Plus, the Woolie's just so cute; he's bound to put a smile on any kid's face, no matter how heavily the weight of the world rests on her small shoulders.

Order this sunny friend at www.etsy.com. It'll make your little worrywart forget his troubles.

Stamp Out Invites

There are always kid's birthday parties to plan. And while many have resorted to the uncouth social hammer of the Evite, some dedicated mommies prefer the old-fashioned paper (recycled, of course) invitation, distributed through snail mail.

These "Small Object" stamps would be just perfect for personalized invitation making. While professionally printing unique invitations for a four-year-old might be expensive idiocy, making some cute ones by hand could earn you the Martha Stewart Good Mommy Award. Just use these kiddie scrawl stamps on the front of the cards, handprint the info inside, and voila, fabulous invitations are ready to go.

Of course, these stamps are multipurpose, since after the invite making session they become an art aid for the kids. Excellent. Order them at www.roseandradish.com.

A Quality New Home

No, not a home for you. This is a home for your kid's dolls (or stuffed animals, Lego people, fairies, or whatever wants to reside there).

Many dollhouses these days are made out of cheap plastic dreck. It's doomed to landfill from the moment of purchase, and it singularly lacks charm. Dolly deserves better. Now, all your child's inanimate friends can glory in a quality new home. This dollhouse is made of wood. It comes completely furnished and includes two residents, although the living arrangements can change at any time once the domicile comes home to live at your house. And just look at the paint job! It's not big enough for Barbie, but since she already has the lion's share of goodies I say that's just tough luck.

Good news: it's also on sale! Grab it on www.oliebollen.com for $99.00. It'll last forever, but not in that landfill sense. Plus, check out the wooden castle while you're at it, just in case Dolly needs a country estate.

The Perfect Hangout

School may be starting up again, getting those kids out of your hair, but don't rest on your laurels too long. They'll be back, and they'll need somewhere to go.

That's why this Forest Friends Bower seems so ideal. Not for your kid's "forest friends," but for his real ones. This incredible handing canopy is much more than mere decoration. This thing is big and funky, and comes complete with its own "forest friends," including an owl and squirrel, plus a moss-covered top and weighted "roots" that keep this fanciful shelter open wide and ready for play. Sure, you get all this fun, but there's more: this thing can hang outside or in, off a tree branch or over a bed, in the front yard or down in the finished basement. It's the perfect kid hangout for many locales.

While the "Bower" seems pricey at $139.00, it may see you through many a summer's afternoon and rainy morning. And you can't put a price on peace and cooperative play. Order it at www. magiccabin.com.

Banana

Ah, the banana. It's nature's perfectly inoffensive food, easily digestible, potassium rich, and neatly self-contained.

But sometimes nature's self-containment system fails. And when that happens with a banana, it's a fairly gross mess. Unless you're a big fan of banana slime all over the inside of your bag, a more bullet-proof coating is necessary. This nifty banana holder really does the trick. It's long. It's yellow. There's no mistaking what it's holding. Plus, the banana inside stays pure and pristine, ready for your child to consume it neatly at the park, or for you to gobble upon finishing your Boot Camp class.

Locate this fruit safety system at www.honey-bunch.com. It keeps your bananas from going, well, bananas.

Stylin' Back To School Supplies

School starts late for LAUSD, not until September 9 (my kid has actually been asking when she gets to go back, since summer has lasted about a million years already). This year, there's a list of supplies she'll need (since California's budget crisis makes it impossible to pass out paltry pencils to the kids it's supposed to educate). And I figured, why not buy the best supplies around?

In light of this, I went on a search. The site See Jane Work has some of the best back to school stuff I've seen, and the prices are perfectly good. Take, for instance, the Gummi bear dual purpose pencil sharpener and eraser. Or, the clear, non-goopy Gluestick Jr. Or, how about the adorable Kitty Cat stapleless stapler? Such good stuff, and you don't have to schlep to Office Depot to buy it, either. The site even offers environmentally responsible pencils.

View all this back to school bounty and more at www.seejanework.com. And then, send your kids back to the classroom with a smile.

Family Portraits?

Decorating a kid's room, a boy's room in particular, is a real challenge. I mean, do you go for the all sports motif, or immerse him in deep space instead? And what about the the race cars (don't you want him overly interested in fast cars at an early age? C'mon, you know that you do).

So how about something a bit more offbeat, even elegant? Take these portraits by Berkley Illustration, for example. They're understated, tastefully produced, and just a bit creepy. They're also better dressed than any of my ancestors. The animals range from the strange,like the Great White Shark or the accurately lounging Brown Bat, to garden variety yet formally attired Squirrels, Deer, and Big Cats. There's even a Turtle.

Pick three (they're SO reasonably priced), frame them and hang them for a decorative display and a homage to the weird. They'd also be excellent in a kid's bathroom.

Find these fine art portraits at www.velocityartanddesign.com. Because if your kid has to hang out with his decor, it should involve these guys.

Practical For Life

Teaching a child life skills is a huge responsibility. Literally, your job, as a parent, involves teaching your kid to get up in the morning, take care of themselves, and launch themselves into their day (unless, of course, your parental dream is to have some slacker lounging about the house). To this end, here's some help: Montessori toys.

For those not lucky enough to send their children to a Montessori school, these Practical Life toys give your kids a taste. These toys are actually learning devices, teaching kids "grown-up" activities like managing buttons and zippers, learning how to tie a bow, learning how to sweep and clean a floor, and so much more. Kids like this kind of thing; it makes them feel important and competent, valuable feelings for a productive life. Kids don't think of these tasks as work, but as fun accomplishment. It's a win/win situation for everyone involved.

Find these fabulous toys at www.alisonsmontessori. com. Order these highly affordable toys and watch the skill set explode.

Baby Book That's Worth a Look

So there are babies being born. And gifts to buy for them. And most baby books are the most disgusting, frilly, noxious things on the planet; truly an affront to books everywhere.

Except for this baby book. This one is pretty cool and graphic and stylish. The sedate colors are refreshingly unisex, and the bunny is so simple and sweet, without being cloying. This is, simply, a very nice baby book which begs to be filled with trivia, facts, figures and offerings from the little tyke, until the ripe old age of three (at which point the kid can fill his own book). Done well (and not even requiring scrap booking tools), a baby book can be a joyous heirloom. Really.

All this class and zero pink doesn't come cheap: about $110. But it sure beats another Diaper Genie (do they even make those things anymore?). Find it at www.aplusrstore.com.

Time for ABCs

It's almost back to school time! How great is that? But what about your younger, not-so-ready for school time players stuck at home with you?

It's never too early to educate. And, it's never too early to educate in a funky-cool manner, either. Take, for instance, these cut alphabet blocks from the 1930's (when kids didn't go to school until they were five, and then they walked five miles in the snow even in the springtime, blah blah blah). There's fifty big wood letters in this set, enough to spell your underage tyke's name and then some, not to mention the fascinating structures built with them once the reading urge wears thin.

These are one of a kind, and it's a bit of a cash drain at $95, but they've already lasted a lifetime, so I'm sure they could add a great deal to your child's life, too. Find the ABCs at www.threepotatofourstore.com.

Catapult!

It's the end of summer. It's hot. The great outdoors are sounding less appealing, but you don't want your kid lying around the house like a lox, staring at the tube.

Here's a project that'll keep both of you busy for at least an afternoon. Meet the Catapult construction kit. This medieval weapon of choice just needs glue, scissors and patience. Think of all the fun to be had, safely tucked away in a bedroom, catapulting lego figurines, cat toys, balls of foil, and any other small and relatively harmless object for long distances. Build structures and destroy them. Annihilate whole armies with makeshift cannonballs. And accept the fact that sometimes playtime is a violent, yet satisfying business.

Find this weapon of mice destruction at www.uncommongoods.com. And remember: school starts soon.

Construct-A-Meal

Trying to get a toddler to feed him or herself is always a challenge. Table manners go out the window, encapsulated in the moment the lethal fork leaves your child's hand and goes whizzing toward your head.

Here's some flatware your kid might just want to keep in their little fists. Made of lightweight plastic in yellow and black, the shovel (!), fork and spoon look like a construction site. Indeed, they're modeled to resemble those much admired bulldozers and dump trucks that children of all genders like to push around. And now, they can use them to push their food into their faces. Problem solved! At least, until you try to take the silverware away.

This toddler version of Tiffany flatware is available for purchase at www.vat19.com.

Handy Monsters

There really are times, even in this age of the digital and electronic, that simplicity rules. Especially when it comes to entertaining kids.

Take a look at these completely ingenious hand temporary tattoos, for instance. Each tattoo turns an ordinary hand into a spectacular, expressive hand puppet. Invented by spanish designer Hector Serrano, the tats go on in a jiffy with a little water and keep the young ones occupied far better than any crummy video you could turn on. Plus, each package offers eight different monsters and animals, for a whole menagerie of fun. They also could be a great party favor, since a set of eight costs about eight bucks.

These are not available in the US just yet; find them at www.npw.co.uk. It's a handy way to occupy a little play time.

Betty Delivers for Boys and Girls

My grandmother had a Betty Crocker Cook Book for Boys and Girls. I perused its dog-eared pages obsessively. The Igloo Cake, the Penuche Icing, the Pigs in Blankets all made such sense to me.

This completely retro cookbook will make complete sense to your child, too. It's lighthearted and friendly, but with specific instructions for perfect presentation (although I personally have my doubts about the "Three Men on a Boat" atop of cheerios; sinkage seems most likely). It definitely hawks tons of Betty Crocker products within its pages, but since most of them are obsolete, there will be no fights at the market. It also encourages cooking for the parents. Imagine that: real breakfast in bed (hopefully, not the aforementioned "Three Men in a Boat).

One warning: to their credit, the publishers left the old text untouched. This is not particularly politically correct eating. But surely you can get beyond this; your kids certainly can. Order hours of kitchen fun at www.barnesandnoble.com.

Tinker Tailor

Actually, not so tinker after all. This real Singer sewing machine is fully operational, so you can put your kid to work, hemming pants and fixing all your separated seams.

The kiddie labor idea aside, this machine really is the bomb. It's small, but it boasts a real foot pedal with backward/forward powers. All the specifics, from bobbins (do they even have those in sewing machines anymore) to needles is just like the big models. Plus, it comes with pre-cut fabrics for very easy, rewarding projects. They call it the "fashion center," but I call it a great solution for rainy days.

True, all this utility doesn't come cheap. The whole thing is about eighty dollars. But you could use it in an emergency, too. Find it at www.youngexplorers.com. And get ready to start buying those Vogue patterns.

Energy Pig

Decorating a kid's room takes a fair amount of thought. I'm not talking deciding between the SpongeBob Squarepants or Disney decor; I'm talking some interesting, tasteful stuff that'll stimulate the kid AND not make you want to heave.

That's why I like this silly lamp. It's an energy-saving piggy, done up in minimalist black and white and boasting a super-efficient curly florescent bulb for a tail. Yeah, I know, those fancy new bulbs give off some seriously crummy light, but it's so good to set an example. Apparently, the big plus of those inadequate bulbs is their stay-cool capacity; no burn risk for you or your tot. And it's just so cute.

Find the pig lamp at www.momastore.org. And teach your kid that, sometimes, it's ok to be a pig for the planet.

Not Burberry, Better

During the winter months in Los Angeles, it sometimes feels like my girl's drowning in hoodies and slickers. Where's the class, I wondered.

Here's the problem: the "class" would involve big names like Burberry. And if you buy a Burberry trench for your child, you're a choad and shouldn't be reading this blog. I mean, really, for shame. What you need to find is a reasonable facsimile for a mere fraction of the price, which my friend Alison did for me, rather effortlessly. Can you believe this Burberryesque trench is from Target? Even better: can you believe that it's under twenty bucks? Ok, fine, it probably doesn't repel water like a Burberry duck, but who cares? It's so cute. And if there is a real downpour, you'll be reaching for that tacky slicker anyway.

Order this stylish moneysaver at www.target.com. And remember to silently thank Alison for possessing both class and thrift.

Elephants Never Forget the Time

If you have a child between the ages of three and six (or know someone who does), you know that time is of the essence. Getting ready, getting fed, getting out the door all depends on being on time. Kids, of course, must be taught to tell time, but with the preponderance of digital, time is reduced to silly numbers on the screen. How do you make learning to tell time fun?

Turn to a classic. Modernist George Nelson invented many iconic clocks, and this Elephant Clock is among them. Check out the fun, yet spare design (fingerprints!). Use its analog format to teach the kid the proper structure of time (that old-fashioned dial makes all the difference). And rest easy knowing that you're also exposing the kid to plain old-fashioned good taste. What could be better?

On top of all that, elephants are beloved gender neutral creatures, comfortable in any bedroom and almost any decor (maybe not Princess Disney. But if you have Princess Disney slathered all over your girl's walls, you probably aren't reading this blog). Order Mr. Nelson's elephantine creation at www.velocityartanddesign.com. It's a gift the child will never forget.

Jammed

No, I don't mean the strawberry kind. I'm talking about a traffic jam, something I'm sure every person in America knows something about. But this is a game, and what an absorbing game it is, too.

I have a version of this traffic game (called "Parking Lot") on my iPhone, and my girl loves to play it (she's gotten pretty good, too). The premise of this in the box game, Rush Hour, is that a particular car is caught in traffic and the cop must help to extricate it from the jam. There are traffic laws and laws of physics to obey, of course. And the board's set ups are generated from cards you select. The great thing? It's a solo game that'll keep your kid occupied while you work, make dinner, or have a phone conversation. Plus, the kid is really using that gray matter. It's excellent.

Help your kid get lost in traffic by ordering Rush Hour at www.amazon.com. It's the only traffic jam you'll actually welcome.

Super Booster

Little people (your little kid, for instance), often have big problems at the dining table. No, I'm not talking about the hurling of spaghetti, I'm talking shortness and failure to see over the table edge. A boost is what's required.

Thus far, though, I've never seen a booster seat that's ever been anything but hideous. Or huge. Or glossy, reprehensible plastic. Until now. This booster is made of something soft and squishy. It's also lightweight for easy cartage in your car. And take a look at the design. It's the Yellow Pages. This mammoth directory costs a forest of trees to produce; it's the dinosaur of directories. But you can have a constant reminder of business searches past every time you whip this out for the kid.

This item could also be useful for ultra-short in-laws in deli booths, but I'll leave the ultimate alternate uses to you. Let your fingers do the clicking at www.oliebollen.com.

Draw on the Furniture

Toddlers, little heathens that they are, love taboos. Especially when the infraction involves a Sharpie marker and your Corian countertop. Crazy making!

I know it seems counterproductive to get your little muralist a gift that encourages this behavior, but at least it'll keep them occupied and away from the remodeled surfaces. This Color-It footstool is extra-sturdy cardboard that can hold up to 60 pounds. Its plain white expanse just begs your child and friends to draw all over it. Just let them go wild: paint, the evil Sharpies, mud, whatever. It's just cardboard, after all. And for your child, it's a satisfying way to engage in a taboo without timeouts.

Color-It also comes in briefcase form, just in case your kid's a budding rebel executive. Find it at www.momastore.org. And let the defacement begin.

Insta-Tent

On these hot, hot days and equally steamy nights, your children long for the outdoors. And while that backyard overnight sounds fun, who really wants to hammer and peg together that real tent?

Avoid the grunt work and get this kid's camping tent instead. There's absolutely no hammering, struggling, cursing and stretching required. Just shake the tent out of its bag and it opens automatically, creating a sun shaded environment for children by day and a bug shelter by night. The bonus? You can't really fit in it, since it's for kids! You can stay inside, in the air conditioning, while the kids pretend to camp out. Brilliant. What I'm not sure about is just how easy it is to stuff that auto-unfurl tent back into its home, but hey, every activity has a small downside. It's still superior to scraping mud off of stakes.

The camping tent is online at www.magiccabin.com. Order it for insta-fun.

A Sense of Scale

Kids love looking at pictures of animals. But what most books can't deliver is a sense of scale: just how big or small is that animal, anyway?

Life-Size Zoo solves this dilemma. Brimming with life-size, to scale shots of over twenty different zoo animals, this book gives kids an idea of how they'd measure up against a gorilla, or just how petite that meerkat really is. Plus, it has games, tons of nature facts, and plenty of encyclopedic info for your curious child. It's bringing the zoo into your home, but without the smell.

This is also a very economical gift, at the extra special price of just twelve dollars. You can't beat it. Order online at www.amazon.com. And let the safari begin.

The Key to Quiet Time

You know how you can go out and buy fancy cat toys all day long, and all the cat does is play with one of your socks? Well, babies and toddlers are very much the same. One of the most popular "adult" items that fascinate babies is a set of keys.

With this set of "Love" keys, you can hand the baby a realistic and convincing version of what you're carrying around, but without all the sharp edges and eye poke potential. They're made metal (in either silver or gold), clank authentically, and each key is a different shape and size (so far superior to those cheapy plastic versions, the cat toys of the toddler universe). And, they're easy to carry in a purse, just like real keys (the perfect restaurant distractor).

Order the "Love" keys at www.mollaspace.com. It just might be the key to some parenting success.