Practical For Life

Teaching a child life skills is a huge responsibility. Literally, your job, as a parent, involves teaching your kid to get up in the morning, take care of themselves, and launch themselves into their day (unless, of course, your parental dream is to have some slacker lounging about the house). To this end, here's some help: Montessori toys.

For those not lucky enough to send their children to a Montessori school, these Practical Life toys give your kids a taste. These toys are actually learning devices, teaching kids "grown-up" activities like managing buttons and zippers, learning how to tie a bow, learning how to sweep and clean a floor, and so much more. Kids like this kind of thing; it makes them feel important and competent, valuable feelings for a productive life. Kids don't think of these tasks as work, but as fun accomplishment. It's a win/win situation for everyone involved.

Find these fabulous toys at www.alisonsmontessori. com. Order these highly affordable toys and watch the skill set explode.

Baby Book That's Worth a Look

So there are babies being born. And gifts to buy for them. And most baby books are the most disgusting, frilly, noxious things on the planet; truly an affront to books everywhere.

Except for this baby book. This one is pretty cool and graphic and stylish. The sedate colors are refreshingly unisex, and the bunny is so simple and sweet, without being cloying. This is, simply, a very nice baby book which begs to be filled with trivia, facts, figures and offerings from the little tyke, until the ripe old age of three (at which point the kid can fill his own book). Done well (and not even requiring scrap booking tools), a baby book can be a joyous heirloom. Really.

All this class and zero pink doesn't come cheap: about $110. But it sure beats another Diaper Genie (do they even make those things anymore?). Find it at www.aplusrstore.com.

Time for ABCs

It's almost back to school time! How great is that? But what about your younger, not-so-ready for school time players stuck at home with you?

It's never too early to educate. And, it's never too early to educate in a funky-cool manner, either. Take, for instance, these cut alphabet blocks from the 1930's (when kids didn't go to school until they were five, and then they walked five miles in the snow even in the springtime, blah blah blah). There's fifty big wood letters in this set, enough to spell your underage tyke's name and then some, not to mention the fascinating structures built with them once the reading urge wears thin.

These are one of a kind, and it's a bit of a cash drain at $95, but they've already lasted a lifetime, so I'm sure they could add a great deal to your child's life, too. Find the ABCs at www.threepotatofourstore.com.

Catapult!

It's the end of summer. It's hot. The great outdoors are sounding less appealing, but you don't want your kid lying around the house like a lox, staring at the tube.

Here's a project that'll keep both of you busy for at least an afternoon. Meet the Catapult construction kit. This medieval weapon of choice just needs glue, scissors and patience. Think of all the fun to be had, safely tucked away in a bedroom, catapulting lego figurines, cat toys, balls of foil, and any other small and relatively harmless object for long distances. Build structures and destroy them. Annihilate whole armies with makeshift cannonballs. And accept the fact that sometimes playtime is a violent, yet satisfying business.

Find this weapon of mice destruction at www.uncommongoods.com. And remember: school starts soon.

Construct-A-Meal

Trying to get a toddler to feed him or herself is always a challenge. Table manners go out the window, encapsulated in the moment the lethal fork leaves your child's hand and goes whizzing toward your head.

Here's some flatware your kid might just want to keep in their little fists. Made of lightweight plastic in yellow and black, the shovel (!), fork and spoon look like a construction site. Indeed, they're modeled to resemble those much admired bulldozers and dump trucks that children of all genders like to push around. And now, they can use them to push their food into their faces. Problem solved! At least, until you try to take the silverware away.

This toddler version of Tiffany flatware is available for purchase at www.vat19.com.

Handy Monsters

There really are times, even in this age of the digital and electronic, that simplicity rules. Especially when it comes to entertaining kids.

Take a look at these completely ingenious hand temporary tattoos, for instance. Each tattoo turns an ordinary hand into a spectacular, expressive hand puppet. Invented by spanish designer Hector Serrano, the tats go on in a jiffy with a little water and keep the young ones occupied far better than any crummy video you could turn on. Plus, each package offers eight different monsters and animals, for a whole menagerie of fun. They also could be a great party favor, since a set of eight costs about eight bucks.

These are not available in the US just yet; find them at www.npw.co.uk. It's a handy way to occupy a little play time.

Betty Delivers for Boys and Girls

My grandmother had a Betty Crocker Cook Book for Boys and Girls. I perused its dog-eared pages obsessively. The Igloo Cake, the Penuche Icing, the Pigs in Blankets all made such sense to me.

This completely retro cookbook will make complete sense to your child, too. It's lighthearted and friendly, but with specific instructions for perfect presentation (although I personally have my doubts about the "Three Men on a Boat" atop of cheerios; sinkage seems most likely). It definitely hawks tons of Betty Crocker products within its pages, but since most of them are obsolete, there will be no fights at the market. It also encourages cooking for the parents. Imagine that: real breakfast in bed (hopefully, not the aforementioned "Three Men in a Boat).

One warning: to their credit, the publishers left the old text untouched. This is not particularly politically correct eating. But surely you can get beyond this; your kids certainly can. Order hours of kitchen fun at www.barnesandnoble.com.

Tinker Tailor

Actually, not so tinker after all. This real Singer sewing machine is fully operational, so you can put your kid to work, hemming pants and fixing all your separated seams.

The kiddie labor idea aside, this machine really is the bomb. It's small, but it boasts a real foot pedal with backward/forward powers. All the specifics, from bobbins (do they even have those in sewing machines anymore) to needles is just like the big models. Plus, it comes with pre-cut fabrics for very easy, rewarding projects. They call it the "fashion center," but I call it a great solution for rainy days.

True, all this utility doesn't come cheap. The whole thing is about eighty dollars. But you could use it in an emergency, too. Find it at www.youngexplorers.com. And get ready to start buying those Vogue patterns.

Energy Pig

Decorating a kid's room takes a fair amount of thought. I'm not talking deciding between the SpongeBob Squarepants or Disney decor; I'm talking some interesting, tasteful stuff that'll stimulate the kid AND not make you want to heave.

That's why I like this silly lamp. It's an energy-saving piggy, done up in minimalist black and white and boasting a super-efficient curly florescent bulb for a tail. Yeah, I know, those fancy new bulbs give off some seriously crummy light, but it's so good to set an example. Apparently, the big plus of those inadequate bulbs is their stay-cool capacity; no burn risk for you or your tot. And it's just so cute.

Find the pig lamp at www.momastore.org. And teach your kid that, sometimes, it's ok to be a pig for the planet.

Not Burberry, Better

During the winter months in Los Angeles, it sometimes feels like my girl's drowning in hoodies and slickers. Where's the class, I wondered.

Here's the problem: the "class" would involve big names like Burberry. And if you buy a Burberry trench for your child, you're a choad and shouldn't be reading this blog. I mean, really, for shame. What you need to find is a reasonable facsimile for a mere fraction of the price, which my friend Alison did for me, rather effortlessly. Can you believe this Burberryesque trench is from Target? Even better: can you believe that it's under twenty bucks? Ok, fine, it probably doesn't repel water like a Burberry duck, but who cares? It's so cute. And if there is a real downpour, you'll be reaching for that tacky slicker anyway.

Order this stylish moneysaver at www.target.com. And remember to silently thank Alison for possessing both class and thrift.

Elephants Never Forget the Time

If you have a child between the ages of three and six (or know someone who does), you know that time is of the essence. Getting ready, getting fed, getting out the door all depends on being on time. Kids, of course, must be taught to tell time, but with the preponderance of digital, time is reduced to silly numbers on the screen. How do you make learning to tell time fun?

Turn to a classic. Modernist George Nelson invented many iconic clocks, and this Elephant Clock is among them. Check out the fun, yet spare design (fingerprints!). Use its analog format to teach the kid the proper structure of time (that old-fashioned dial makes all the difference). And rest easy knowing that you're also exposing the kid to plain old-fashioned good taste. What could be better?

On top of all that, elephants are beloved gender neutral creatures, comfortable in any bedroom and almost any decor (maybe not Princess Disney. But if you have Princess Disney slathered all over your girl's walls, you probably aren't reading this blog). Order Mr. Nelson's elephantine creation at www.velocityartanddesign.com. It's a gift the child will never forget.

Jammed

No, I don't mean the strawberry kind. I'm talking about a traffic jam, something I'm sure every person in America knows something about. But this is a game, and what an absorbing game it is, too.

I have a version of this traffic game (called "Parking Lot") on my iPhone, and my girl loves to play it (she's gotten pretty good, too). The premise of this in the box game, Rush Hour, is that a particular car is caught in traffic and the cop must help to extricate it from the jam. There are traffic laws and laws of physics to obey, of course. And the board's set ups are generated from cards you select. The great thing? It's a solo game that'll keep your kid occupied while you work, make dinner, or have a phone conversation. Plus, the kid is really using that gray matter. It's excellent.

Help your kid get lost in traffic by ordering Rush Hour at www.amazon.com. It's the only traffic jam you'll actually welcome.

Super Booster

Little people (your little kid, for instance), often have big problems at the dining table. No, I'm not talking about the hurling of spaghetti, I'm talking shortness and failure to see over the table edge. A boost is what's required.

Thus far, though, I've never seen a booster seat that's ever been anything but hideous. Or huge. Or glossy, reprehensible plastic. Until now. This booster is made of something soft and squishy. It's also lightweight for easy cartage in your car. And take a look at the design. It's the Yellow Pages. This mammoth directory costs a forest of trees to produce; it's the dinosaur of directories. But you can have a constant reminder of business searches past every time you whip this out for the kid.

This item could also be useful for ultra-short in-laws in deli booths, but I'll leave the ultimate alternate uses to you. Let your fingers do the clicking at www.oliebollen.com.